Misunderstanding Loneliness

All alone in a room full of people. My voice is mute, my thoughts are clouded. It appears to be socially unacceptable to let the true me shine in this room full of strong personalities. If I invite the real me, I may lose those who I love most. I am the help, the person who doesn't belong and whose station was raised with a single encounter. So, instead of being me, I fade into the back corner and become a version of me that will be conducive to the environment I am residing.

Where is God in this seemingly well thought out plan?

Can we not trust Him to shine through us?

Did He not place me here for His glory?

These are the questions that truly matter. We should ask who do you want me to be God? Not, how can I change to be accepted by those around me? Those that I assume are better than me. God's will brought me to this place that according to popular culture I don't fit. So now, instead of trying to conform, I must trust God and endure. We are not always brought to a season for our personal comfort but instead we come to achieve our divine purpose in Christ. How many of us can say, it wasn't easy... but God? I know I can!

We all have a unique place in God's majestic plan and there isn't one of us who shines brighter than the other. Loneliness is a heart issue. It's about so much more than our proximity to people, yet we assume the cure is "person to person" interaction. On the contrary, a group of people will not automatically create the connection you crave. That can only be found in Christ!

My road can still be uneasy but I trust God to work it out as He has so many times before. The enemy feeds on loneliness and will most certainly plant seeds of doubt that create bitterness. Your struggle then becomes self-inflicted and a breeding ground for more sin. If you aren't diligent and intentional in your self-care, instead of looking inward for purging and pruning, you will place blame on others when in fact they have nothing to do with your current circumstance... That's the nasty game satan plays.

I do not have a forceful personality and usually I bend my will to accommodate others but in doing so, I always find peace. That is if I have taken proper care of my spirit. Peace is more important to me than power. Our words have power, so use them carefully and if voicing them creates conflict, I would rather not speak in a situation. That doesn't make you weak, it makes you wise. This is why we were taught as children to think before we speak. Although, I don't always apply this practice, I do make it a point to do better each time I forget.

We absolutely cannot allow satan to make us feel lonely or disconnected when we don't get to have a say. In the past, after sharing my feelings or opinions my husband has told me "Your feelings are inaccurate." or "Your opinion is not accurate."... I can hear you laughing but I got a little offended at these remarks not fully understanding what he meant. So, I pondered like Pooh Bear and dwelt on these statements and journaled my thoughts and researched his remarks. Then in my personal prayer time, God dropped a little nugget in my spirit...

Feelings are often inaccurate indicators that our emotions operate from causing us more problems than we started out with!

I see now that our feelings are not always created from facts but often times they are influenced by what we see or what we hear. So, a feeling of loneliness can come from a deceitful source of information. This is when we must search our hearts and remove anything ungodly. Regardless of how I feel or what I think I know, I will trust God's plan. Even so, I will stay true to my God and where He has placed me. If I keep my mind protected from evil imaginations then I am doing myself a great service. I must be confident that though I feel alone, I am not. The darkness cannot over take me, the light of God will prevail and it will break through the box meant to destroy me.

"Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me." -Psalms 51:10

Alone is scary. Alone brings sadness. Alone is painful. Alone is discouraging. Alone feels uncertain. Alone can be mistaken and confuse your thoughts. Be careful to guard your heart and mind from misunderstanding emotion that was created from misguided influence. Take your influence from those who are invested in your spiritual and overall well-being and success in life.

Alone is also the place where God can speak clearly into my spirit. He brings me to a place of isolation to refocus and recenter my purpose in Him. Alone is where He takes me when I rely more on people than Him. It's the state of mind that forces me to my knees in prayer. The truth is, He never leaves me alone! Even when I struggle, He is there but I must be quiet to hear Him. He is always walking with me, even when I feel the weight of loneliness more than ever. I must be still and listen.

You see, your social status only matters here on earth, it is not and never has been a condition of your worth in God's eyes. Find your confidence in who He says you are. Sometimes, we just have to be willing to let go of the idea that changing who we are will bring us where we want to be. Changing for a person will always bring you heartache because eventually people will desert you if you are not who they want you to be. However, when that happens, God will be right by your side. He will never leave us or forsake us.

Don't allow your desire for acceptance by others to be more essential than your destiny in Christ. It will always bring you unhappiness and leave you unfulfilled, searching for more. Center your life, your purpose and your dreams in Christ. He is where your greatest fulfillment will come. He is always faithful in your trials. Even when you feel alone, remember that you are not!

"The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still." -Exodus 14:14

Love BIG!

XO- Denisha Karmè